… was to talk about the way our society has glorified marital affairs. You know = infidelity, cheating, lying, having sex with somebody else’s spouse. Don’t believe me? Listen to the songs on your radio, turn on your television, rent a movie. It is everywhere and we’ve made it okay. It has always been this way but it is getting worse. However, something happened as I was writing, I have no idea what it was, but the whole subject changed. So, I’ll give a small glimpse of what I was going to write about.
I found myself humming that song by the Manhattans “Lets just kiss and say goodbye”
What a sad song. Two people, hearts shattered, two people who love one another but they can’t remain together. It’s not because of their parents, it isn’t even because it’s a time when color or religion would keep them separated. It’s because they have “ties”… other ties, it’s called ties, as in, captured. (Sarcasm off) I’m assuming, feel free to correct me, but, I’m assuming it’s because they are MARRIED.
I remember when I first heard this song as I rode the school bus ( In case you are wondering, I’m 51) my thoughts wandered to my then current crush. I’ve always been a sucker for sad music. I thought this to be a perfect song for me and that cute boy, who I consider to this day my “first love”. It was a perfect song because my parents would not allow us to date. Another story for another time. I had no idea the reason for the song was completely different.
Now, I don’t mean to be a Debbie-downer or go all dramatic on yall , and I will admit that I have changed a lot of what I am able to stomach on television the books I can read or songs I hear, it’s just way too raw for me. I quit watching “Scandal” because it was too much . Sounds dramatic, I know, but it’s real for me. It’s nothing but depression, a reminder of where my life looms. Over at my one of my new hangouts: here they call it a “trigger” and boy, do I get a trigger when I hear and see anything even alluding to an affair.
I believe wholeheartedly that our marriages and families are purposely hit and under attack. Those of you who are believers know exactly what I’m talking about. We have men and women affairs participating in affairs and encouraged by their friends to carry on. We have betrayed spouses, broken hearted and nearly urged to take their WS to the cleaners, divorce them and burn them at the stake. This is what is happening now to our relationships. To make matters absolutely worse, we have children, our future, innocent children watching and learning how to manage relationships by watching us, parents, the grown-ups who by the point of having children, should have our urges somewhat under control.
What are we going to do about this, what are we going to do?
This, That, and Maybe More 
I was in the middle of watching Mad Men when truth began to come out in our marriage. I have not been able to turn that series back on. I can’t watch anything that glorifies affairs anymore. Just can’t.
And yes…the attacks are real. And the outfall is more than we can imagine.
I’m sorry you are part of this club, but appreciate your insight and depth of understanding.
What are we going to do? Face the truth and walk through the fire. That…that is where real freedom exists. And where our relationships can flourish like God intended.
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I agree, my H was just sharing with a friend of his yesterday how wonderful our relationship is now, better than ever. The friend asked: “Why is that?” My H responded that as the girls move on with their lives we have less stress, more time. But really, how could he answer? As I’ve written, he has yet to admit to his affair. Affairs? Could be more than, who gets caught the first time? Few, few because the cheaters are too careful. Anyway, I’m learning that him admitting to it might not happen. That can be between him and God. I’ve asked, accused, and begged for answers. From both he and God…. hehe.
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