Category: Life and Marriage- Do I stay or Do I leave/

Friends, and not so friends,

I truly do appreciate the words of wisdom and encouraging e-mails, even the harshly written ones that accuse me of wallowing in pity and taking away any blame for the H. Oh, trust me, I’ve taken away no blame what-so-ever. I know.

I’m just enjoying myself, blowing off a little steam. That’s all.

Give it time, you’ll see.

Dearest H,

What wonderful news I have (for me) what wonderful news.

As I watch you pull inward I believe I know what you are thinking about, of course, I cannot be entirely sure… however, I can speculate. It seems a bit suspect that it happens at the same time that I confront one of those W that I think might somewhat belong WITH you. ( Notice not to)

 

I don’t really know the purpose of your affair, makes no sense to me. Mostly because she was not yet married for two of the years that  I know of, that you were together. Why not leave me and move on?

To boot: Not only do the two of you go like mad leading up to her marriage, but after, she waits (tries?) to hold off for a month, or so, after getting married. Only to pick it right back up. AGAIN.

I don’t get it.

Affairs.

Emotional Affairs.

Physical Affairs.

Any kind of Affair(s)

 

When I finally got her on the phone, Live, at least, she asked me to call back in 45 min. When I called back in “45 min”, she asked for another 45.   I, stunned , responded if  she knew who I was, she replied “no, that is why I would love to talk” gave me a phone number and again, she stated she had NO idea who I was. She giggled , at least from what I remember she giggled, she then said that she was  looking forward to finding out who you ( the W Husband in question are.)

Ha

I’ve not called back, no way will I hand (back) over any type of control. Next, she will ask me to come to HER home, sit on HER sofa so that we can talk about this weird accusation that SHE/HER/SHE  IS having an affair with MY old, wanna be (young) big thing  (shh) Husband.

BTW, readers, I KNOW SHE  They IS  are were once HAVING AN A WITH MY H. Yes indeed.

Shhhhhh, Be clear, This is NOT a squeeze out, hold feet to fire kind of post.

 

I DO NOT, think I am blackmailing, bribing, insisting……

 

He might feel a little irritated about this, sad, distasteful, statement.

BUT, the end game:

Who.The.Eff.Cares?

 

 

 

 

I want to be clear that I am not trying to threaten, I  wish no harm. In addition, I mean what  I say. I just want answers and there are two who can give answers. One refuses, the other is her, the OW .

The last thing I want to do is to contact your Dear Husband. I’m sure he loves you very much and would be devasted to know what you have been and are continuing to do. I’m ashamed of my husband not only for ruining his own marriage but potentially destroying the marriage of another. I am sick that in his selfishness he has trampled the heart of another man, one that he does not even know. His wife? Pfft, he surely will have a reason. 

When a person, male or female want to have an affair, they will have an affair. I am in great shape, you would never guess my age, and I am a kind and loving woman. I am not saying that NOT being any of these things would be a reason for an affair, I am saying this because I try, I work hard to stay healthy, and somewhat decent looking for myself and my husband. I want for him to be proud of me, happy that he chose me.

 I think People that “wander” outside their marriage tend to be on the selfish side, so I suppose this should not come as a surprise ( His decision to Affair). However, to ruin another marriage honestly shocks me. In other words, chasing after a busty, hot looking, younger, and single chic? So classic, …. just so classic. A live-in with lover, now, newly married woman, 40 pounds larger than I,  naturally BEAUTIFUL,  woman…. MARRIED, woman, MARRIED younger woman, MARRIED, taken woman???!!!  I am saddened.

My husband is a Christian, has he shared this fact with her? He also is a “Promise Keeper” (Look it up). As a “Promise Keeper” he was to be in a place that would keep him accountable. He was to hang with a group of men that are stronger and more grounded than he. For a while, he did, and then slipped away. I watched as the group of men that he was “accountable” to let him go, mostly relieved I think.

My husband has a large, personality. Gigantic! Many find him annoying. Conversely many find him honest, genuinely, painfully honest. My thoughts are that these Christian men discovered their little support group quiet, and light, no real problems. Readers, have you figured my husband is a short man?! LOL , it’s true. 

How much longer, I’m not sure but I know the time is near. How near?

Well, near enough to not be last year at this time, sleepless nights,  tired days. Searching drawers, closets, socks, and underwear. Looking for anything that will give a clue to exact times and when.

I’m not a coward, I DO have courage. I’m not a chicken, whimp and I’m not gutless. I am quite capable of confronting pain, angst, lies and whatever / whoever else needs confronting.

 

However

Even though I KNOW I am RIGHT. Even though I KNOW times, dates, places .. I am TERRIFIED there is that one teeny-weeny little chance I’ve got it wrong.

He Knows This.

They Know This

He has contributed to this.

They have contributed to this.

It’s called GASLIGHTING.

 

So I guess in a sense I have contributed to this.

 

I’m nearly sure it happened again,  I mean WTF, just WTF.

We arrived at our vacation home the day before. I sat at the table working, closing at the books for OUR business.  I knew it was coming because he is so predictable, “they” are so predictable.

I know, he knows, she knows and we all know that her place of work is in located in the same area, lot as the small town grocery market. It took me three years to figure it all out. I knew it was someone but honestly, I NEVER would have considered HER to be the OW. She lives directly behind our home. I went to SPOKEO, looked up every single person that lives behind us, saw her pic and thought “hell to the no” there is NO WAY, he would go for her.  You see, when I was able to GPS him (before he discovered my tricks) I saw him hanging out at her home for hours at a time, on the weekends he would need to go ahead or without me.

Anyway, I knew before we left this would happen. Three months ago, I would have insisted to go with him, this time I came to the realization, they would find a time somehow, somewhere.  So, I let him go.

When he walked out the door, I called her. I asked for her, and when I reached her desk she announced her name:

“I just wanted to let you know that your boyfriend is on his way. He forgot his phone, will you please have him call me when he gets there? I need him to bring something else home/

Silence “I’m sorry?”  she asks.

Before I could repeat or respond, she hangs up.

I hang up, walk outside to smoke a cigarette and say or do nothing.

He is gone an hour. I get back to work.

He walks in, I’m on the phone with my receptionist walking her through a challenge she is having.

He has a bouquet of flowers and as I talk, he cuts stems, finds a vase and places them on the counter.

I stand up while saying good-bye and turning the phone off.

“How nice, thank you, I say”.

He responds:

“I went to see my gf at work, and picked these up for her” Looks at me sheepishly. “Just kidding, you’re my gf and you’re working.”

I knew he knew, he knew I know… and guess what? I’m sure they each got a chuckle.

What the two of them do not understand is that this ball-less chick has had her balls delivered. I’m playing cool, I’m back to playing naive. But, I’m playing.  Four more months… just four months. I can’t wait to share with you all where I am then, and wht I have.

 

 

 

 

My Name is Lori

I am a Whore(ie)

I love to fuck your man

Just because I can

I might be somewhat fat

Yet imagine that

He so loves it in my ass

(Does that sound crass?)

He will scream and yell

Oh, I love to tell.

Please don’t judge me

I’m just Lori

 

I like to take your man

Just because I can

I love it up my ass

Just imagine that

I love to hear him cum

We have so much fun

Yes, I’m newlywed

But I will still give head

To the husband that is not mine

I’ll do it anytime

Yet, I’ll keep my pride

Yes, I’m a new bride (but)

I can still  take your man

and will because I can.

I never had much luck

with high school fucks

so now I’m up in years

I’ll take yours, despite the tears

That I cause my groom

Just know, there is still more room

for the guy who married me

his wife, Lori

Who will take your man

Just because I can

 

BU

Dear Readers,

Please tell me what you think of the following letters I plan to send within the next week or so. Read and give me, if you will, your thoughts.

 

Dear OW Two,

Enclosed you will find a letter that your newly, married husband will receive at the same time you receive this, if not a day or two later. I couldn’t decide how I wanted to expose the both of you to your husband news like this is NEVER easy to deliver. Also, we all know what happens to the messenger. Imagine hearing the person you trusted absolutely, is not only a cheater but a liar.

For people like you and the other cheater, it’s not easy to explain. Cheating/ failure to remain faithful is quite painful. Especially to the person who is remaining faithful to you, the cheater.

So that you understand about yourself and my H:
nar·cis·sism
ˈnärsəˌsizəm/Submit
noun
noun: narcissism
excessive or erotic interest in oneself and one’s physical appearance.
synonyms: vanity, self-love, self-admiration, self-absorption, self-obsession, conceit, self-centeredness, self-regard, egotism, egoism

I’ve given you several chances, via voice mail to quit screwing my H. I even had the opportunity to speak to you directly, only for you to hang up on me, walk out of your place of work and fuck my husband, all within 30-45 minutes. I’m not quite sure what he has that not only keeps you coming back, but causes you to risk a marriage with a man that apparently is pretty crazy about you.  Men such as he are so hard to come by, and here you’ve gone and ruined him.

It has occurred to me while writing this, perhaps you and your current, newly, married husband have an agreement, an open marriage, hell, if that is so….. shame on me. Just so you know, I DON’T have an open marriage and will never agree to one.

Both you and my husband, I hear, find it quite funny, the voicemails I’ve left for you. Apparently, you each are under the impression that I am full of B.S. I have no balls (physically true) I won’t follow through.  I told you in the very beginning I would blow this open if you continued AND if you continued lying to your husband. Now look what you’ve done, I have to be the one to tell him now.

You know why I’ve kept this secret for so long, you know all the people involved in both parties lives will be strained if not ruined. It is your fault and My Husbands fault. The OM can be kept a secret if you desire, it’s up to you. However, it very well could be revealed when it’s discovered a couple is divorcing.

Carry on with your work, Dear Girl, carry on.  I’m sure I will know you’ve read this letter because my H will be busting through the door shortly after.

Happy New Year

 

Dear Betrayed H,

It with fear and sadness that I write this letter to you, your wife should have received her own at her place of business.  She has a copy of what I am sending you, although I greatly debated whether or not it was a good idea to do so, in fact, I was encouraged NOT to send her a letter because it would give her time to come up with more excuses and lies.

 

There really is no other way to deliver this than to just come out and say that your wife and my H are having an affair. I thought it ended some time ago so I kept the news back, I didn’t want to ruin a new marriage. However, when I kept receiving texts from an unknown/anonymous sender, I decided I should probably be more aware.

I had my H followed and watched (He travels extensively) and sure enough. I am guessing the reason it was able to get by me for so long because of the traveling. Unfortunately, about the time you and your wife married, their texting picked up, daily, hourly, every few minutes. My H has another phone that I still can’t find, but I know it exists. I’ve heard it and seen it on Network, but there is no assigned name for it.  Anyway, this news came as shocking and heartbreaking to me, when it picked back up again.

I am trying to stop it (for your sake) before it grows as strong as it was the middle of 2017. From roughly May – August , I believe they were non stop in touch. My H quit traveling so much, but now it is picking back up again.

As for me, I will more than likely be leaving our 30- year marriage, torn apart by self-centeredness and greed, I would suppose.

I remain anonymous because truthfully, I detest confrontation, and fear the results of your broken heart. I don’t enjoy this one bit and held off to pass the holidays. As I shared with your wife, it could be possible that you have an open marriage and if you do, shame on me.

I left your wife several voicemails at her place of work, encouraging her to confess to you because I believe with confession comes the hope of forgiveness.

 

I am sorry to deliver this news to you. I’ve come to a place that I’ve grown tired and quite ill watching these two cheaters get away with having great spouses while being horrible mates.

I wish you all the luck and strength needed to carry on through this painful news. Unfortunately, it takes a while to get over the shock and your emotions will range from denial, rage, depressed, to denial again. They will loop themselves over and over again. Don’t be like me and believe the excuses and lies, remember this: “Cheaters Lie”.

This is not because of you and she might try to tell you it is your fault. Do Not believe this lie either.  I’ve found this website helpful, they have a wonderful group of people that are sincere and will help you if you allow. Or, you can just come to read.

http://www.survivinginfidelity.com

 

 

 

 

 

 

WHO – Who else knew/knows, who else has helped to keep the secret; lied to my face, looked in my eyes and acted as if we are a genuine couple, a couple that has made the marriage last longer than most, these days.  

WHAT – What made you believe it was worth the risk of family, not just me, the BS, but the family, kids, in-laws, and friends?  What was the thought process the first time, the first meeting, the first kiss, the first romp? What was the thinking the first time you came into the office or home after saw me after touching, kissing, and cheating?

WHERE– Where did these encounters take place, when not in my home or hers? Where did you slip away to call her? Where did you hide your other phone or your other form of communication since you insist never has been a mobile phone?

WHEN – The first time, When? When did you decide to cross the line? When was it that you concluded it would not matter if your wife would be broken, shattered until who knows when? When did you decide it was worth the risk? When did you choose this marriage wasn’t worth fighting?

WHY- Why, why couldn’t you come to me if you were so unhappy? Why wouldn’t you follow through with the promises made to one another, why would you allow yourself to be the person we swore never would become?

HOW – How could you?

And, the question I so desperately need to be answered: Who will you go to when I find what I need; What will I do when I find what I need? Where will I go when I find what I need; Why do I wait to find what I need?

HOW could you?

 

 

 

Which do I post? The Note to Thing One or note to Thing Two? The pain and anger, they are the same. The only thing I no longer feel (at this time at least) is the humiliation.

That, I feel for about two or three minutes, I then remember that by touching base with most (of you)  to let ya’ll  know, I am very aware of who you are and that I KNOW.

Know what?

Those other women are indeed desperate. Desperate enough to open legs for a married man. Desperate enough to hope and pray the married man they are pretending to be crazy over truly is, in a miserable, sexless and bitter marriage. Desperate enough to convince their own self and heart nobody will be hurt, nobody will leave bruised and weak. In the end, you (the OP/AP whatever) are taking the hit so that e-v-e-r-y-one will be able to “Carry On”

 

Of course, I am Sarcastic. Nobody,  Nobody but the BS is taking the hit. Nobody but the BS is Overlooked. Nobody but the BS feels pain and humiliation. You, you are providing a favor for the BS, you are allowing her to have the freedom and opportunity to be loved; to be loved by somebody who will …. well, somebody who will love her, somebody who will be faithful.

You don’t know, OP, you don’t know that you are the typical OW. You are the OW who deep down, way down in her heart is fearful, fearful and hopeful that you’ve found happiness, finally. Deep down you are hoping that his friends will now be yours without thought or suspicion. You are hoping that life (his and your new) will carry on without a glitch. You will step into her shoes yet, remain in your own life. You hope nobody will consider you a desperate whore because you’re probably are not.

As much as the BS desires for you to be a whore she, the BS probably knows that you are just that, Desperate. Feeling old and lonely. Fearful enough to take a deep breath and settle for a taken man.

It is all fun and games until the holidays. You feel special and sexy, hot and desirable until the holidays. Christmas Eve, you wait for the phone call, the call that confirms (to) you how he misses you and so badly wants to be with you, make love to you, ravish you and be with you. You are fulfilled and delighted while you speak on the phone or maybe he will even meet for a quickie. He then leaves, again, to be with the wife, the “sexless, bitchy, unhappy and nagging wife”.  As far as you know he is miserably sitting in the midst of “her” family, wishing he were with you. BUT,  you know, deep down you know… He is laughing, eating and drinking, carrying on the traditions with his wife and her family. You know that he is without a thought (to you) enjoying this holiday, feeling safe for the moment, he has touched bases with you, the OW, satisfied you for the moment until the next time.

 

Merry Christmas, Other Woman. Merry Christmas.

It is with his family he spends the important times with, memorable times.

And, OW, while you cry, feel jealous and shamed know this…

So does the BS, She feels the same. She knows, she is aware… the trip to the market, the trip to pick up the forgotten, hidden gift left at the office… She (I) is very aware that gift, the forgotten gift left at the office, the one he left to retrive…. The gift is truly just a phone call to you.

 

Merry Christmas, Other Woman and Betrayed Spouse, Merry Christmas.

And to all… A Good….

Dear Thing Two,

I am writing this against the advice of a few of my friends, they are of opinion it will simply give you satisfaction, in addition to a sense of empowerment, they think it will make this nasty affair more exciting for you, and your boyfriend, that is, once you tell him.

I don’t think it matters much anymore to me how either of you feels because people like the both of you, you’re, selfish, self-entitled, and really, you don’t have the “shame gene”, it’s all about getting what you want, now and not later. I have known your boyfriend for many years, I know how he thinks and operates. If you were not the “person” he was screwing I would imagine it would be somebody else. I would bet the same is for you as well. If not for my husband you would have somebody else’s cock up your ass just the same.

So, what is this letter about? Well, I can’t seem to leave a message I’ve so much to say and it gives you and your boyfriend a false sense of security…….. apparently, he has passed a message on to you that his wife has. no. balls. Figuratively speaking, I hope you know.

I’m not the type of woman who thinks her spouse is innocent, I know you did not seduce a poor, helpless man. Although people who think with their parts, seem to me like animals, it’s as if you can’t stop yourselves. I say this because of the fact that each of you has allowed one another into your very, own homes, it’s about the most disgusting thing I can think anyone can do.

I feel so sorry for your newly, married husband. Just weeks, maybe days before marrying him, you were fucking my husband. In your home, probably in your bed. And, just days is it before or after (?) becoming engaged.. you were fucking my husband, in my home.

Oh, yes, my dear. You think I didn’t know that when my husband arrived at my home earlier than I that you were fucking him in my home, you ran out the back when I arrived. Yes, my dear, trail cameras, they pick up EVERYTHING. Even a fat ass running out the door.

I’ve relished this bit of information for quite some time now, what has it been a year… no a year plus. And, guess who will be getting this information soon?

I want to guarantee to you that I WILL pass this information on, I am waiting for the perfect time (for my benefit). The arguments that your boyfriend and I have had have nearly broken me, I must say. The actions that each of you have taken will affect so many people, more than your newly married husband and your boyfriends’ wife. (Remember, that would be me)

So,unless you plan to run away with my husband into the wonderful sunset,and you don’t care about your current, newly married husband, I would suggest you start thinking up some reasons why you would be seen leaving out the back of my home at such a late time, when your poor then live-in boyfriend, was probably out working, trusting his sweet, timid, loving and faithful, live-in girlfriend. His “Sweets”.

HAH!

So, as this letter comes to its sad end, trust me, it’s not the end. I am not sure how long I will allow this to play out, I’ve got some time left before I absolutely must make a move. Physically and figurately.  I’m pretty sure that you and my Husband won’t be able to stay away from each other too long, since no matter how much fighting my Husband and I have done, and you’re so newly married and you each  still, continue to fuck one another while hurting the two people who are trying to stay true to the pair of you.

Each lame excuse the two of you create to meet up be it at the grocery store, around the corner at friends home, waterhole or there off river/upper soda, where he thinks I believe he likes to check out the fisherman, I know. I know so much more than your boyfriend thinks I know.

Do me a favor, honey, will you? Tell your boyfriend ( My husband) that I have been watching and listening sooooo much longer than he knows. Yes, since the very beginning. So, all those days/nights there on Wells Ave, when I was home, running the business…. all those days when I was running the business, paying attention to the kids like HE SHOULD HAVE BEEN, I know when he was hanging at your house, “having a beer with B(your then live-in) Yeah, I know. I saw I heard.

So, pass this message on the next time the two of you speak or text.

Oh— one more thing…. have you ever heard of the software  “Wireshark” ?  You might want to look it up, you know.. google.  It is a program that can intercept texts, images, and videos. Yeah, so those cute little, nasty videos you like to send, the sexy little horny girl that you are??? LOL can’t wait for your newly married husband get’s a glimpse of what you like to share with others.

Be well, Dear girl looks as if it’s going to be over for you and your newly married pretty soon.